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*Satire* New Policy on Rated Content
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Invelos Software, Inc. RepresentativeKen Cole
Invelos Software
Registered: March 10, 2007
United States Posts: 4,282
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*** What follows is our April Fools gag of 2010. Although strangely plausible for some companies, Invelos has no intention of heading down this road. ***

Those of you who follow tech news will have followed the stories covering Apple's new policies regarding nudity and/or salacious content.  Since the launch of the iPhone, they've become more and more restrictive of the content they allow on their app store.  Although this policy hasn't been universally cheered, there's no denying that it has cleaned up some of the unneeded fluff and resulted in an app store that's more acceptable to a broad range of customers.

With the upcoming iPhone release of DVD Profiler, we faced a decision: we could continue our open policy of allowing "adult" content and risk our app being delisted, or we could follow Apple's lead and eliminate this unnecessary category from our listings.

However, we quickly determined that cultures vary greatly in what they deem acceptable.  In many countries, partial nudity is fine, but violence is heavily restricted.  In others, a 1-second glimpse of an uncovered breast is enough to send the politicians into a multi-year tirade on the perils of indecency. 

We respect the moral imperative of all of these cultures and feel that it would be prejudiced to follow one set of restrictions without including the concerns of all of our covered cultures. 

With that in mind, we will begin an immediate culling of any content deemed salacious, impure, indecent, violent, gruesome, disrespecting of culture, promoting of civil unrest, insensitive to lifestyle choices, political, religious, or otherwise objectionable to any of our users.

We do realize the downside to this policy (that being our database size may shrink somewhat), but we strongly believe the 2.5% of the database that remains after these deletions will be among the best examples of family-friendly programming ever created, and we will be proud to have them!

Thanks to everyone in advance for your support of this honorable and very necessary new policy! 

*EDIT* New research indicates our initial estimate was incorrect - the actual percentage of titles remaining will be closer to 0.025%, or roughly 120 titles total.  It will be a difficult transition, but we're confident it's the right thing to do.
Invelos Software, Inc. Representative
 Last edited: by Ken Cole
DVD Profiler Desktop and Mobile Registrantkahless
TaH pagh taHbe'!
Registered: March 14, 2007
Reputation: Highest Rating
Germany Posts: 17,804
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I have a look at my calendar... 
Thorsten
DVD Profiler Unlimited RegistrantStar ContributorCharlieM
Registered Sept 5 2005
Registered: May 20, 2007
Reputation: High Rating
United States Posts: 2,934
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How purely evil

     
DVD Profiler Unlimited RegistrantStar ContributorLewis_Prothero
Strength Through Unity
Registered: May 19, 2007
Reputation: Superior Rating
Germany Posts: 6,730
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No naked feet anymore     


Quoting Ken Cole:
Quote:
With that in mind, we will begin an immediate culling of any content deemed salacious, impure, indecent, violent, gruesome, disrespecting of culture, promoting of civil unrest, insensitive to lifestyle choices, political, religious, or otherwise objectionable to any of our users.


I hope this leaves at least Titanic in the database.
But probably not, since in this film the poor underdog raises against the highclass nob -> civil unrest!

Sorry Ken,
even though I understand your concerns, if you are going to follow the quoted part to some extend, you'd have to remove nearly all the content from the database.

EDIT: Boahh, you got me Ken.
My calendar was totally unaware of this date.
It all seems so stupid, it makes me want to give up!
But why should I give up, when it all seems so stupid?


Registrant since 05/22/2003
 Last edited: by Lewis_Prothero
DVD Profiler Unlimited RegistrantStar ContributorJimmy S
Registered: March 15, 2007
Canada Posts: 1,982
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So we are supposed to be happy about that...
Don't count on anymore contribution from me or promotion of your software. In fact, the 3.6 version will be the last I will use. I'll cut myself from the online database since now it will became completly useless to me. I remove also my online collection to not offend anyone. It's my last post also since I will not loose my time with a segregated forum.

Have fun with your familly friendly database in the future
DVD Profiler Unlimited RegistrantStar ContributorSpaceFreakMicha
Jesus-Freak
Registered: March 13, 2007
Reputation: High Rating
Germany Posts: 1,774
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Sadly enough, Apple would  prefer such a move...

Oh, an Ken, please: Remove all "Grease"-covers with John Travolta on it, I'm offended by those. 
 Last edited: by SpaceFreakMicha
DVD Profiler Desktop and Mobile Registrantleo1963
Registered: May 14, 2007
United States Posts: 455
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Just one more reason Apple is a company I completely avoid.  Steve Jobs pushing his view points on the world.  What a joke.  Apple can kiss my _______.
 Last edited: by leo1963
DVD Profiler Unlimited RegistrantStar ContributorAddicted2DVD
Registered: March 13, 2007
Reputation: Highest Rating
United States Posts: 17,334
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Yes Leo.. What a joke   
Pete
 Last edited: by Addicted2DVD
DVD Profiler Unlimited RegistrantStar Contributordee1959jay
Registered: March 19, 2007
Reputation: Highest Rating
Netherlands Posts: 6,018
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DVD Profiler Unlimited RegistrantEdwinK
Registered: May 27, 2007
Netherlands Posts: 691
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Green arrow for Ken.
Unfortunately, I can't use DVDprofiler at the moment due to lack of a Windows computer.
DVD Profiler Unlimited RegistrantStar ContributorAddicted2DVD
Registered: March 13, 2007
Reputation: Highest Rating
United States Posts: 17,334
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I was thinking just last night that Ken does something like this every year... and was wondering what he would come up with this morning... Well done Ken!     
Pete
DVD Profiler Desktop and Mobile RegistrantStar Contributormreeder50
I was outta bullets
Registered: March 29, 2007
Reputation: Superior Rating
United States Posts: 2,749
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Just think, no longer will we have to endure anything other than G rated...wait...that's right most of those will have to go to. Actually, reading the context of Ken's new policy, "we quickly determined that cultures vary greatly in what they deem acceptable", there will only be one profile. This profile will be blank so you can close your eyes and imagine whatever content suits you. I think I like it, simple and clean. Not to mention the forums will eventually become obsolete and program updates will no longer necessary. I could go on, but I think that's enough to think about. Thanks Ken, this solves everything, good job.  
Marty - Registered July 10, 2004, User since 2002.
 Last edited: by mreeder50
DVD Profiler Unlimited RegistrantStar ContributorLewis_Prothero
Strength Through Unity
Registered: May 19, 2007
Reputation: Superior Rating
Germany Posts: 6,730
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Someone who has AESP_pres' E-Mail adress should better get him informed about the joke of the day.
He has already deleted his online database and is not reacting on PMs
It all seems so stupid, it makes me want to give up!
But why should I give up, when it all seems so stupid?


Registrant since 05/22/2003
 Last edited: by Lewis_Prothero
DVD Profiler Unlimited RegistrantStar ContributorAddicted2DVD
Registered: March 13, 2007
Reputation: Highest Rating
United States Posts: 17,334
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Don't worry... I am on another board with him... he will know it is only a joke.
Pete
DVD Profiler Desktop and Mobile RegistrantPro_Trek
Who Me?
Registered: March 15, 2007
Norway Posts: 178
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DVD Profiler Desktop and Mobile Registrantkahless
TaH pagh taHbe'!
Registered: March 14, 2007
Reputation: Highest Rating
Germany Posts: 17,804
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Quoting Addicted2DVD:
Quote:
Don't worry... I am on another board with him... he will know it is only a joke.


... and I was afraid to spoil the joke with my broad hint...   
Thorsten
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